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Undulating Piss of Thee Angels or The Difficulty of Chasing a Dragon Forever

by Mother McKenzie

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1.
They aborted Henry Darger from your womb Flowers folded to their buds, the sky was snowing all through June And there were cobwebs in my breakfast, little bed bugs in my room Reaching out to suck my blood and in this mess I reached for you Now my usher, my protector, he is gone Oh with your skin, a sun burned pink I rubbed the tention from your back I wiped away a million tears with this old handkerchief I had And how I wondered why a man can't just spread his wings and fly When a woman loses power among the battle fields of night Now my usher, my protector, he is gone They aborted Henry Darger from your womb He was the king of every child, every flower clutching hand Little bulbous baby fat, his tiny fingers reached to grasp What is God? What is love? Why is everything so sad? Now my usher, my protector, he is gone
2.
I came here on a rocket ship I road the drugged out cloud To find you knelt upon your leopard alter Looking oh so proud I rolled through hills of purple flowers With the softest wind at my back Baby rolling toward ocean sunsets I found true love at last I found true love at last Oh to land here with these gritting teeth And these sticky streams of sweat Before the one I've always wanted babe The one I've never met I light my greasy hair on fire I light my cigarette And then I sit upon your velvet sofa Waiting for what comes next Waiting for what comes next I hide my words in strange mazes I tie my tongue in knots I spit soda fountains across your cheeks You seam to like me a lot And then you tie my legs behind my head Baby I'm your pretzel now You tie a chained leash around my neck And drag me all over town Through places I've never seen And I'm a little puppy dog Or maybe a burning horse I'm like a goldfish flopping around Some public golf course So feed me scraps of newspaper Or feed me your Irish curse and let the clock's hands move slowly babe And let nature run its course Let nature run its course
3.
A hand over my eyes Moonflowers bloom at night You'll guide me... somewhere? Lead me in your hand To a place I'll understand I've been living nowhere! We betrayed each other with sex We betrayed each other with sex We betrayed I like to ride beside you into sunsets Into rainbows Into storms I like to stand beside you And look at oceans And look at rivers And look at stars But we betrayed each other with sex We betrayed each other with sex We betrayed Oh the pale light of the moon Put its fingers around my throat To strangle me in ecstasy Oh God I nearly choked And now I like to stand on buildings All those sky scraping buildings Gazing downward I like to stand on the top of buildings All those sky scraping buildings But I'm a coward
4.
Okay now whose got the biggest toys? And whose got the biggest stains? Across their sheets, across their brains? Whose got the prettiest girls who suck the biggest candy canes? Who waits in lines? Who waits at all? I hear you're teleporting, fuck pumping gas It's the 21st century And you grew up next to me Okay now whose traveled across this earth? Who can't keep track of what they're worth? Whose running factories in Taiwan? Full of little kids bread so strong Whose afraid of being naked? Whose afraid of spiders? Whose afraid of nothing? Set your heart on fire and crawl in bed with me You grew up next to me It's my high school reunion and I'm so high I don't wanna live I don't wanna die Who is smiling? Whose pretending? Who breaks the hearts? Who does the mending? Which spouse's money are you spending? Whose mom and dad is always lending? Whose lovely hairline is receding? Whose lonely past won't stop repeating? Who here is truly free? You people grew up next to me It's my high school reunion and I'm so high (High school is never really over) Don't wanna live I don't wanna die
5.
Waiting for subways in downtown Los Angeles Riding in silence to dark whispering oceans Waiting for heaven, distant constellations Are shimmering above me, are you dreaming of me? This is how I burn for you This is how I burn for you Flowers and succulents, tall swaying palm trees Waiting on benches for buses to take me Gazing through windows at cold faces passing Searching and waiting and pondering and hoping This is how I burn for you This is how I burn for you Waiting for midnight all tangled in warm sheets I vanish into sleeping I vanish into dreaming Reality was strong but it's become so muddy And my sanity was strong but it's become so cloudy And this is how I burn for you This is how I burn for you
6.
At night she pissed in the sink When all the toilets were full And I counted all the scars across her back From a blanket on the floor And I knew it was love Cos I was so hopelessly poor I knew it was love I had only my flesh to offer her So I gave her my skin With the scent of our bodies unwashed A scent that I grew to treasure like gold But it scared our room mate more than god Oh kiss me in this tangled mess of sheets That we've fancied a bed All our tossed bits of trash Formed halos round our two kissing heads "I used to count on rich men I used to use them for their money, drugs, and sex But you were so wild, reckless, and free When I found you in the midnight's hidden depths" We chased bottles of pills with vodka, Woke with blood in toilet bowls And I knew it was love I could feel it through my body's thousand holes
7.
I lived for lust I lived for lust There were so many things I longed to feel But I settled for just a touch You were mine, mine, mine I stole you from a friend And wasted a year just trying to lift My body from your cozy bed I heard of a spot just beneath your hair On the warm nape of your neck That I could touch with my calloused fingertips And make your eyes shine gold beams on my flesh You were mine, mine, mine We entered our union with woe Let's hide when we come home and turn off the lights Revealed by the morning's cruel glow I heard of a joke I could whisper Mold your cheeks into shapes I'd never seen And it filled my heart with something so warm I never thought you'd change the shape of me You were mine, mine, mine I courted you walking on glass But you'd often come to prop my feet up Sing me pretty words and kiss my ass I said goodbye and you got pretty mad I tried to explain you can't hold onto shame Let go of the love that we had You were mine, mine, mine But let go of the love that we had Life is a road you gotta walk on your own Don't get glued to the landmarks you pass
8.
My distracted desk girl, my mermaid out of sea I see you've sprinkled all your pixie dust Your empty handed misery Your wavy hair, your weary eyes Your lotion tattooed skin and me Let's share a smoke Let's share this world Let's share a thousand long lost dreams The wilderness, the coziness Of an apartment gone awry The orange haired cat that licked your cheek And I was jealous every time I kissed your neck, I kissed your lips, I kissed your forehead and your spine My frozen lips, my sleepy kiss Spun wilderness in you and I Stray pubic hair, loose underwear A hoola hoop and pools of wine Dripping from blood crusted lips Upon a pillow next to mine The rainy days, the summer rays A thousand troubled nights All troubled by love overwhelming, Wilderness in you and I A swinging cock, a broken clock Means we've truly lost track of time Nipples erect, my fingers pinched I smelled the stench of dishes piled Unsafe excursions through the shadow tinted streets We cruised at night And what's dripping from our bloody noses? Wilderness in you and I Your unveiled hips, perfection stripped From baggy clothes, a hidden gem A hoola hooping naked girl My fiendish lover and best friend My fiendish lover we'll kill each other If we can't find out how to live Among ourselves, two broken shells Containing souls God can't forgive Loose leaf paper, I'll be a waiter till my novel finds the light We're dipping feathers in our blood We're staying up all through the night She'd write a verse, I'd take the next We wrote a thousand drunken lines Words forgotten, dirty cotton Twenty hollow jugs of wine Her blackened lungs, my abscessed arms Our jealous screams and broken plates Sneaking off, faintly pissed off Branching out to new blind dates But always lost when new partners came It'll never be the same Always lost when new partners came Who could ever be the same?
9.
Your father's tattooed arms would hold you, Comfort you, You've searched your whole life For some kind of fragment I've got some tattoos, I've got one on each wrist, I got one on each arm Even one across my heart So baby come touch me Anabelle Lee What darkness has lead you to me? I'll stand up, I'll speak with conviction Say "Love's an addiction! And all my affection!" Strange chemicals race When I smell flowers in your hair Anabelle Lee What devils have lead you to me? Love becomes obsession And there are broken bottles of wine And there are broken vases of flowers And you're all mine! You're all mine! You're all mine! When we drive in my car We look through windows Exploding with light and noise Shifting patterns in passing crowds I've got one hand on the wheel The others caressing your left thigh And Anabelle Lee Not even Jesus could save you from me

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released February 18, 2014

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Mother McKenzie Las Vegas, Nevada

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